Thursday, February 5, 2015

The Second

We knew we wanted to have more than one kid. When it took us a year to get pregnant with Willa and in the process learned that our chances of conceiving on our own are lower than most couples without any infertility issues, we had the conversation about how long to wait before we start trying for number two.

(Someone actually asked me why we decided to have another one so soon after Willa. I didn't realize two years was considered soon.)

Within the first year of having Willa was not an option. Nor did we want to wait too long and risk it taking as long (or longer) to get pregnant again and have a bigger age difference than we wanted. That's how this fall we decided to start to try again.

I was confident I would be pregnant again. What I was unsure of was how long would it take. 

Well, turns out it only took a couple months. I was shocked. I didn't think it would happen so quickly.

I remember coming out of the bathroom to tell John the good news completely stunned. I'm not even sure I actually said the words. I may have just handed him the pregnancy test.

Almost immediately I started to worry about whether we were ready. Whether Willa would be ready. Every time I did, I would have to take a deep breathe and remind myself that Willa would be nine months older by the time Butternut came. That maybe (just maybe) we'd be coming out of the terrible two stage.

I liked to think about how nice it is going to be to have Willa and Butternut be just a little more than two years apart. Hard at first while they're little. Okay probably hard when they're older too. But hey. No one said parenting is easy. (And if they did, they're lying.)

But now there is no more doubt. Butternut is already loved and a part of this family. And I wouldn't have it any other way.