Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Hump Day Humor: I'm Comic Sans, Asshole.

If there are any unequivocal truths in the graphic design world of nerds, it would be that the font Comic Sans is a terrible, no-good, very bad choice for anything design related. And if you use it, you are then subject to snide comments and jokes about your poor taste and juvenile treatment of the Great Graphic Arts. What makes the comments and jokes even worse is that no one will explain what it is about Comic Sans that is so disgusting and atrocious that it turns otherwise lovely people into Judgy McLookDownTheirNosesons. Which is why I find this letter from Comic Sans so damn hilarious:

Listen up. I know the shit you've been saying behind my back. You think I'm stupid. You think I'm immature. You think I'm a malformed, pathetic excuse for a font. Well think again, nerdhole, because I'm Comic Sans, and I'm the best thing to happen to typography since Johannes fucking Gutenberg.

You don't like that your coworker used me on that note about stealing her yogurt from the break room fridge? You don't like that I'm all over your sister-in-law's blog? You don't like that I'm on the sign for that new Thai place? You think I'm pedestrian and tacky? Guess the fuck what, Picasso. We don't all have seventy-three weights of stick-up-my-ass Helvetica sitting on our seventeen-inch MacBook Pros. Sorry the entire world can't all be done in stark Eurotrash Swiss type. Sorry some people like to have fun. Sorry I'm standing in the way of your minimalist Bauhaus-esque fascist snoozefest. Maybe sometime you should take off your black turtleneck, stop compulsively adjusting your Tumblr theme, and lighten the fuck up for once.

The rest of the letter is here. For the record - I don't use Comic Sans. Anymore. (via FrontBurner)

ANSWER - Tuesday Trivia: Geography

On what body of water is the city of Grand Rapids, Michigan, situated?

On the Grand River. The city was named for its proximity to the river's rapids.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Tuesday Trivia: Geography

Tuesday Trivia is a weekly post of interesting trivia questions. Leave a comment with your answer - or best guess - and come back tomorrow to see if you were right. Happy guessing!

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On what body of water is the city of Grand Rapids, Michigan, situated?

Monday, June 28, 2010

There's No Place Like Home

The conference was fantastic. I'm inspired and have so many ideas that I can't wait to take back with me. I'm really excited to get started on a couple of them.

I stayed in DC an extra day after the conference to hang out with a good friend of mine who lives in the District. There was a party and sangria which always spells a fun time.


I must be getting older because it took me a little longer to regain my energy from the late night followed by travel. Though I'm still wiped of all creative thought.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

A Box of Chocolates

I'm tired and exhausted and in DC for a conference for the good ole jay-oh-bee. And to top it all off, I left my camera cord at home so I can't show you any of the pictures from the twilight tour of DC that I took last night. But I can point you to the twitpics I posted on Twitter. You're following me on Twitter, right? RIGHT?

The Capitol
The reflecting pool (JENN-AYE?)
Lincoln looking pissed
The Korean War monument
The White House (hello Mr. President)

During the tour, our guide kept throwing trivia questions at us. I have a head for random trivia - hence Trivia Tuesdays - which comes in handy for trivia nights and tours of DC with mostly strangers. Here's a hint. It's not always about knowing the exact answer but knowing enough in the general subject to make an educated guess. For example, our guide was talking about the Library of Congress. So he asked us what the oldest book in the Library of Congress is. I know that the oldest book in print is the Bible. So I took a guess that it would be the oldest book in the Library of Congress. Turns out I was right.

I got two blisters on my feet during my travels to DC so I can't even wear the cute heels I brought with me which is such a bummer because they are super cute. And I feel like such a slob wearing my flips when there are so many other cute shoes being worn.

Here's a conference tip from me to you - make friends with the pregnant girl because she's got drink tickets she's not using. Plus she's just a lot of fun.

Hump Day Humor: When BP Spills Coffee

What is happening in the Gulf of Mexico is a catastrophe. While we must work together to put a stop to the leak as well as cleaning up the mess, we should also take time to make a little fun of BP. I give you the best 2 plus minutes of your day:

From Cary.

ANSWER - Tuesday Trivia: The Bible

According to the Old Testament, what were the ten plagues visited upon the Egyptians when their pharaoh refused to free the Israeli slaves?

As told in Exodus 7-12, the plagues were: the waters of Egypt turning into blood; frogs; lice; flies; cattle disease; boils; hail; locusts; darkness; and the slaying of the firstborn.


Congratulations to MirandaP for being the first one to get the correct answer!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Tuesday Trivia: The Bible

Tuesday Trivia is a weekly post of interesting trivia questions. Leave a comment with your answer - or best guess - and come back tomorrow to see if you were right. Happy guessing!

<><><>

According to the Old Testament, what were the ten plagues visited upon the Egyptians when their pharaoh refused to free the Israeli slaves?

Friday, June 18, 2010

Breaking Up is Hard to Do

I had to end a relationship recently. It was a tearful goodbye I didn't want to say.

But it wasn't working out between us. He was lazy and wouldn't do what I asked him.

I gave him many months to get his act together. He kept making excuses and blaming his problems on anything else besides himself.

So I broke up with Petey, my TiVo.

I didn't want to do it, but we needed a new cable box for our new TV and the only one they had available also was a DVR. So I cheated on Petey while I gave our new DVR Milton a chance to prove himself.

And while Milton isn't fancy or quick, he does record when I need him to and can even record two shows at once. Petey, though I loved him for many years, couldn't do that.

Though he hasn't been a stellar boyfriend for almost a year and refused to connect to the network - the same one that Charlie the laptop connects to no problem - to download show information that was necessary for recording anything, I am still broken hearted to see him go.

I'm sure I'll regret this decision sometime in the future and will want to go crawling back to him. I just hope he'll take me back.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

My Body is Finally Not Sore Anymore After All That Hard Labor

We've finally finished the first step of Project Update Kitchen: tile the floor.

Ok, that's a lie. There's one teeny tiny step left. We have to get a carpet guy in here to retack the edges of the carpet that border the kitchen. We pulled them up to get the tile underneath.


Here's the before picture of the nasty vinyl floor:




Mid-demolition:




The bare concrete floor:



The demolition was by far the hardest part of the whole process. It took the entire first day to pull up at least 1 1/2 layers of vinyl.


In the middle of laying tile:






The finished floor:




Lessons learned from our first major home improvement project:

  • It always takes longer than you expect it to.
  • Accept help that has been offered from someone who has done it before.
  • It always costs more than you expect it to.
  • Be prepared for unexpected surprises.

Lucky for us, our unexpected surprise in the first project wasn't major. When we moved the refrigerator back to the kitchen from the living room and tried to hook up the water hose, we noticed the hose from the wall was leaking. It wasn't something we couldn't fix ourselves with a quick trip to Lowe's. We tried that. So we were forced to call a plumber, which thankfully ended being not super expensive.

DH blamed the frustrated moment on married life. Because as he put it, "If I wasn't married, I would never have redone this floor." Ok that's true.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Hump Day Humor: Indian Superman

I have no idea why the woman is in a Spiderman costume. Unless there was a Spidergirl. I'm peacefully ignorant of the comic book and super hero genre.

ANSWER - Tuesday Trivia: States

How many years were there between the admission of the first and fiftieth states into the United States?

Almost 172. Delaware achieved statehood on December 7, 1787; Hawaii, on August 21, 1959.


Congratulations to Beckles for being the first - and only - to get the right answer!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Tuesday Trivia: States

Tuesday Trivia is a weekly post of interesting trivia questions. Leave a comment with your answer - or best guess - and come back tomorrow to see if you were right. Happy guessing!

<><><>

How many years were there between the admission of the first and fiftieth states into the United States?

Friday, June 11, 2010

The Forgotten States **UPDATED**

Yesterday I was driving home to pick up DH on our way to dinner and was singing along to Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers' "Mary Jane's Last Dance." After the first verse about a girl who grew up in an Indiana town, I got distracted from the song by thinking about how Indiana is not one of the cool states.

I mean California rocks the casbah with its awesome weather and wine country along with Oregon's own wine country and gorgeous landscape. Then there's states with a cool history that goes back to revolutionary times and such like Massachusetts, Pennsylvania and Virginia (and several more). Alaska and Hawaii have the intrigue of being almost exotic places since they're not part of the continuous 48 states. And Texas, well Texas is the shiz.

Most of those states you either love or hate. There is no grey area. But what does Indiana have going for it - aside from the Tom Petty song? ___________ I'm drawing a blank. I'm sure there's something cool about Indiana. I just have no idea what it is. (I once had the pleasure of meeting someone from Indiana. And all I could say in response to him was "Well, that's neat.")

Indiana is one of my forgotten states. You know those two or three states you can never ever remember when you play the name the 50 states game. (Oklahoma would probably be one except for as a Texas neighbor he's like our little cousin who is a little slower than everyone else so we stick up for him by always remembering his name.)

What do you mean there are 50 states? Are you sure there aren't 45? Because I can name all the states and I know I got all of them and I only counted 45. You're sure then? Well, crap. Which ones did I forget?

It's always the same ones. Indiana, Iowa, Wyoming and the Dakotas. (One of my roommates in grad school was from South Dakota, and I still can never remember it.) I'm sorry I always forget about you.

UPDATE: Kentucky! Another state I'm always forgetting. I even forgot that I forget it. Oy.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Girl Talk Thursday: Favorite Children's Books



Not to be confused with the Girl Talk Thursday post from a couple weeks ago on reading, this week's topic is children's books - then and now.

There are so many. Countless Babysitter Club and Nancy Drew books. Also, a few Bobbsey Twins.

But my favorites impacted me in a more profound way. The top 3:

Charlotte's Web
The book that showed what friendship should be about - the acceptance and support of a friend no matter the differences through the hardships we must endure in life.

Make Way for Ducklings
Of all the children's books, this one really stuck with me. So much so that the first time I visited Boston and I was walking through the Public Garden and came across the swan boats and bronze ducks that are in the park to commemorate the book I immediately recognized them for what they were even though I had long forgotten that the book was set in Boston.

Anne of Green Gables
I should really make room for this book on my top 5 list as I love it so much. Anne is just such a fun character with a wild imagination and a fierce friend. I reread this as often as I can.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Hump Day Humor: The Drunk Gets Dressed

Why are drunk people so freaking hilarious?



From Cary.

ANSWER - Tuesday Trivia: Movies

What headgear did John Wayne wear in all his films starting with Wake of the Red Witch in 1948?

A toupee - often under his ten-gallon hat. Wayne removed the wig for some scenes in
The Wings of Eagles (1957), when he played his character as an older man. He joked about his hairless pate in El Dorado (1966), with the line "Ride, baldy, ride."

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Tuesday Trivia: Movies

Tuesday Trivia is a weekly post of interesting trivia questions. Leave a comment with your answer - or best guess - and come back tomorrow to see if you were correct. Happy guessing!

<><><>


What headgear did John Wayne wear in all his films starting with
Wake of the Red Witch in 1948?

Monday, June 7, 2010

This is the Best Year

Saturday we went to my cousin's high school graduation. In the valedictorian's speech, she talked about high school being the best years of one's life. For those she was directly speaking to - her fellow graduates - that statement made sense. They're just exiting high school, which has been the best time of their lives - ok well probably not all but most of them anyway - it's natural that they would look back on the most recent years of their lives as the best.

While I sat there listening to her speech, I reflected on how people I knew in high school and college call those years the best of their life. Don't get me wrong. I enjoyed both high school and college. I had many great times during those ten years (high school, undergrad and graduate school).

But there is so much I want to do still in life that I have absolutely no intention of living with my eyes only looking behind me. I want and strive to make every year of my life the best one. So yesterday, I took DH to a movie and found some new amazing recipes to try.

Because it doesn't always have to be a big event to make every year the best, even though I'm pretty sure I already have met that goal for this year with the whole getting married thing.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Book Review: Assassination Vacation

Assassination Vacation by Sarah Vowell

This nonfiction journey through the story behind the first three assassinated presidents (Lincoln, Garfield and McKinley) and the men who gunned them down was a more interesting read than any American history book I read in school. In large part because Vowell is obsessed with presidential history. But not just presidents... death too.

So naturally she's intrigued by those presidents who have been assassinated. She drags her friends and family as well as the reader along with her on her pilgrimages to visit anything even remotely connected to the assassinations to see her sacred relics related to their histories visiting graves, statues, museums and even the small plaques that commemorate various historical events.

Full of snark Vowell's recounting of the people as well as the political and social circumstances of those times were captivating and tinged with her political views that were not difficult to discern.

The tone and style will not be for everyone. But if you like snarkiness and history, it's an interesting read.

Next month - The Lace Reader by Brunonia Barry

Disclosure: No one paid me in any way, form or fashion to do this review.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

One Love

So after the whole of W Day (Part I and Part II), the man formerly known as DF who is now known as DH and I left on a jet plane for that wondrous paradise full of reggae music and laidback people where there are no problems only situations, the home of Red Stripe, Bob Marley and jerk chicken, the setting of that Disney classic Cool Runnings, also known as Jamaica.

It is a beautiful place with gorgeous flowers...



And waterfalls...


We stayed at Sandals Whitehouse European Village & Spa, which was amazing.




One of DH's favorite things about the resort was the giant chess board. Every time we walked by it, he had to take a move even if it was clear there wasn't a real game going on and someone had just placed the pieces randomly on the board.


The view from our balcony.


There were several peacocks in the resort that just wandered around. We called the biggest one Captain Peacock and made up stories about him and his harem of female peacocks.


We kept fairly busy sailing the resort's Hobie Cat boats.


Taking a glass bottom boat ride to get a look of the coast line and some of the underwater views since they weren't really letting anyone snorkel. Something to do with currents and undertows and our safety yadda yadda.


We also went ziplining, which was so much fun




But most of the trip was spent sitting on the beach or by the pool


Reading


Or napping


We even managed to get in a couples massage and walked the beach often



Our last night we had a candlelit dinner on the beach. The mosquitoes were horrendous. Thank heaven our server was one step ahead of those tiny monsters as she brought us some Off and after that we were the only ones eating on that beach.


The whole trip was pure bliss. I managed to leave my laptop at home and didn't watch the news the whole trip. It was a week of not thinking about anything but reading and whether or not to get another drink, which the answer to that question was always uh, yes please!



I was not ready to come back. And working on this post, I got nostalgic for the reggae music that was always in the background while we read by the pool. I may have downloaded myself some Bob Marley. Don't judge me.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Hump Day Humor: Font Conference

If fonts had personalities... From Cary.

ANSWER - Tuesday Trivia: Oscars

Who accepted her Best Actress Oscar statuette with the words "Hello, gorgeous"?

Barbra Streisand, in 1969 when she won for her film debut as Fanny Brice in
Funny Girl - in which her opening line, spoken as she looked at herself in a mirror, was "Hello, gorgeous."

Congratulations to eaucanada for being the first one to get the correct answer!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Tuesday Trivia: Oscars

Tuesday Trivia is a weekly post of interesting trivia questions. Leave a comment with your answer - or best guess - and come back tomorrow to see if you were correct. Happy guessing!

<><><>

Who accepted her Best Actress Oscar statuette with the words "Hello, gorgeous"?