Anxiety had slowly been building for a couple weeks. Pretty much since I had started to write it down. The anxiety quickly built throughout last week until Saturday when I wasn't sure if I could eat anything because I had so many butterflies fluttering against the walls of my stomach that nothing sounded appealing.
As the time drew nearer, the pounding in my head started. And I could barely stand.
I had a speech to give. A toast. The maid of honor toast at my little sister's wedding.
The anxiety wasn't because I would be speaking in front of close to 200 people. The nerves were due to the fact that I didn't want to CRY in front of 200 people. And it's a fact that I cry. Easily. Especially when I share things that are personal and close to my heart. (And my toast was about as personal and close to the heart that you could get without it actually being my heart.)
Because this fact is well-known in my family, my brother-in-law, DBF and my brother started a bet on how far into my speech I would get before I had to stop and compose myself because I was so emotional. And we decided that if I made it through the whole speech without stopping to compose myself, I'd win the pot.
You can bet your ass I won that pot. It wasn't a lot of money, but it doesn't matter. I wanted to show them that I could do it. I think it was that bet that really helped keep me from crying. That and the fact that I had practiced that toast multiple times a day for at least a week and a half. And of course, I wanted to WIN.
And like I snapped my fingers, my headache was gone as soon as my toast was over.
The wedding was absolutely gorgeous. And perfect. And so so so much fun.
Oh, did I tell you about my super secret project that I had been working on since February? (Can't remember where I've talked about it.) Well it was super secret because it was my wedding present to my sister and her husband. Here's a picture before I got it framed.
The top says "From this day forward" and at the bottom it says "Laura & Jeremy May 23, 2009".
Congratulations once again Laura & Jeremy!!